Websters defines Relentless as "that does not relent; unyieldingly severe, strict, or harsh; unrelenting: " It means to be "rigid, unbending, obdurate, adamant, unyielding."
My heart is on a road I've never really been down before like this. I mean, I've loved Jesus and purused Him, but I've just seen something in Him in the last few months that has altered me. Altered my perceptions of life. Altered my perceptions of being a Christ follower. Altered my perceptions of the battle we are involved in. Altered my perceptions of HIM.
The last several months have brought on much craziness in our lives. From issues we are dealing with in our children, to this crazy, amazing trip across the world to Africa, to selling our house, to moving, to.....there is a long list of things I could keep naming. Bottom line, in the midst of it all, there has been a battle going on. It is a battle for my heart. There are 2 battles really. One is being waged by the enemy of my soul. He wants to destroy my heart. He wants nothing less than to destroy me, to knock me down, to knock me out of the battle altogether. His attacks are fierce at times. But they haven't destroyed me yet, and by the grace of God they won't. But he is relentless in his attempts to destroy what Christ has done in me. To destroy the works that Christ is doing in me now. And to steal and destroy my destiny in Christ.
The other battle is one being waged by Father. It's not even close to the same kind of battle, but it is a battle nonetheless. It's a battle FOR my heart. He WANTS my heart. And not just part of it....He wants all of it.
I am learning through all of these different things, that in order for me to continue on the journey, I MUST be relentless in my pursuit of Him. I must be rigid when it comes to how I live my life. I must be adamant and unyielding to what I will and will not do. To how I will determine to go after His heart with all that is within me. I must be Relentless. I want to be unyielding to the ways of the flesh in my life, to the ways of the world. I want to be anything but status quo when it comes to how I pursue Him.
On the flip side of this, I am learning that His pursuit of me is the same...it is relentless. He is jealous for me. He doesn't want part of me. He doesn't want half of me. He wants ALL of me. And so out of that intense love He has for me, He pursues me...relentlessly. In His pursuit He allows me to walk through different valleys, periods of darkness, periods of sorrow. Why? Because He knows that when I walk through those times, when I find Him in the midst of it, my heart is forever changed. He knows that during those times, He becomes my all in all. And so He pursues...relentlessly.
You see, in His relentless pursuit of my heart, and by allowing me to walk through the valley, when I have tasted Him, when I have tasted His goodness in the darkest of times, He knows that it will turn my heart to pursue Him. And the more I see His goodness in the darkness, the more relentless I will be to pursue HIS heart. See the connection? Friend, there are some priceless treasures to be found in the darkness. (that's a whole nother blog right there!)
He pursues me, so that I will pursue Him. He draws me so I will seek. It is relentless. And I want to be relentless in my devotion to Him. He loves us, oh how He loves us......relentlessly.....
Have you been reading my mind? Do you live in my house and I remain unaware that you hear our conversations? Oh, friend, I love when Jesus says the same things to the same people at the same time. I continue to be so blown away by how God--THE God--the one who is sovreign, is so head-over-heels in love with me that He would fight for every scrap of my heart. It BLOWS ME AWAY! And it gives me such hope that no matter what happens, He is fighting for me. The I AM is jealous for me, and He will not let me go--so the fights can wage on, and they always will--but His grip is so tight and His love so great the He can't help but fight for His bride. So, I want to KNOW this holy One who loves me so endlessly. I want to jump off the high dive and know that there's a refreshing pool of crystal clear water waiting at the bottom--even if it appears to be a bottomless pit. I want to be a person so full of His love that the Holy Spirit feels so comfortable in my life, my heart, my home, that he changes into jammies and cozies up--because He knows that He is 100% welcome here. Relentless--that's how to get to that point. If staying out of the valley should cause me to slow down on my pursuit, then please Lord don't you dare keep me out of the valley too long. I'm tired of "being me" and am ready to start really LIVING OUT the person I am "in Christ." No more sinners, acting like saints--but the REDEEMED, declaring victory and pursuing the One who loves us enough to fight on our behalf. Yep, that's the one I want to just spend the day with, just soaking up his glory, majesty, honor, beauty, and strength. I'm so thankful He loves me enough to say, "Oh, dear one I am SO not finished with you...so come along..."
ReplyDeleteThanks for these words, they have spoken to me this evening!